Sarah's Golden Birthday
On Friday night Sarah P. celebrated a grand "Golden Birthday" turning 25 on January 25. For weeks I had been planning the party with Eleni and John. The theme was gold with a dash of marriage. My evite blurb says it all:
"By the age of 25 most Midwestern people have already married, divorced, had children, or held a union job. Sarah has had none of these things. As our plucky Indiana native stands on the precipice of her "late" twenties, we gather to celebrate her singledom and desperation with a bidding war for her hand in marriage (seriously...j/k...no, really). Turning 25 on January 25th, this golden birthday will be sure to shower Sarah with the rites of domestic passage that have long evaded her crazy. Let us raise a golden glass to the golden girl who puts Bea Arthur to shame.
Wearing gold clothing, bringing bars of gold, and/or contributing BOOZE are all highly encouraged. I will use my Midas touch to craft a golden cake that will blind Goldfinger himself with its brilliance."
I love polling guests in Evite invitations and my questions included, "Would you marry Sarah?", "Just how badly does Sarah want to be married?", "How old will Sarah be when she gets married?" It was funny. A few weeks before the party Rob, Sarah, and I went down to the fabric district to get fabric for my party dress. I wanted to sew something outrageous out of gold lame. I have for years. I really want a gold lame turban, a la "Sunset Boulevard." I don't know if Norma Desmond's turban was lame or gold, but she had a turban and I want one. I ended up buying some lame and some fun leopard print, with no idea what I would sew.
I also had the task of coming up with a cake idea that would outshine (literally and figuratively) the infamous CoCake of 2007. I found inspiration at a great website: Coolest Birthday Cakes.com. They had a whole section of Barbie Cakes--maybe you've seen them--it's a cake with a Barbie doll torso coming out of the top--the cake part is Barbie's skirt. I decided to make a Barbie/Sarah cake and put it ontop of a heart shaped "wedding" type cake. For weeks, I was giddy in anticipation of what kind of cake I'd make, the mechanics of assembling, finding gold edible sprinkles, and all the right decorating tools. I ordered a bunch of cake stuff online since I couldn't find a store that carried edible gold flecks, and I found a doll for the cake that had the perfect Sarah bangs.
Meanwhile Eleni and John decided it would be funny to fly in Sarah's ex-boyfriend, Dan Mahoney, and have him propose to Sarah in the middle of the cake cutting ceremony at 11pm. Flights were scheduled, plans were made. Stress levels were high. Everyone was nervous...what the hell was going to happen on Friday night?
Wednesday night I made two trays of lemon and peach Jell-O shots, and sewed a top for the Barbie/Sarah doll out of gold lame. I combed her hair, trimmed her bangs, and sewed a little bouquet of flowers onto her hand. For Jell-O shots I like to use the large box of Jell-O and about 1 1/4 cups vodka instead of cold water. Give it a try, really easy and tasty.
Thursday night I baked the cake at Sarah's house. The recipe was a lemon cake by Martha Stewart. Martha is diabolical. Her recipes are great, but it's almost like she wants you to fuck it up. She has these cryptic instructions, for example, on the lemon cake there was this gem: "Drizzle in eggs, a little at a time, beating after each addition until batter is no longer slick." No longer slick? What the hell does that mean? I made a triple batch of cake: 3 eight inch rounds, 1 square pan, 1 six inch round, 1 pyrex dish. I made a triple batch of lemon curd to go between each layer, and a hell of a lot of buttercream frosting. Some of it I left white, and some of it I dyed a vibrant yellow-gold. Between the buttercream frosting, lemon curd, and cake, the cake had 14 eggs in it, 9 cups of flour, 7 cups of sugar, 4 cups of buttermilk, and tons of lemon zest. There was also a little of my blood in there--from zesting the lemons. I found some lemon extract which really helped give it a great lemon flavor without losing a finger to the zester. Thursday night I baked all the cakes, made the lemon curd, and the buttercream. The cakes were cooled and wrapped in plastic so that they'd be firm enough to shave and shape the next day. I was exhausted, but the mass production of it all was exhilerating. The KitchenAid mixer was filled to the brim. John and Eleni arranged the gold wedding balloons I'd bought in a big heart on the wall.
Speaking of KitchenAid mixers, I really really really want one. It's one of those things that I don't necessarily need, but would be really great to have, and I really really really want one. I've promised myself I won't buy one until I've "earned it." By that I mean, I won't buy it until I can justify dropping $200-$500 on one without feeling guilty about it. They come in such lovely colors! Purple. I want a purple one. Industrial strength.
Anyhoo, I'd worked on sewing my dress a few weeks prior. The lame turned out not to turn out, and as such I turned to the leopard print. For weeks I'd been wanting something sexy in leopard print, but nothing had caught my eye at the stores. I decided to use the fabric I'd bought for the party and ended up sewing a dress that while simple in construction, turned out really hot. I paired a gold lame shrug, and black faux-suede pumps with the dress. When I tried it all on together, I couldn't help but bellow "Goldfinger" in a Bassey boom.
Friday I made more Jell-O shots and then took a nap. I headed over to Sarah's around 6:15 to assemble the cake. I had borrowed Alexis's cake decorating equiptment; she had a decorating stand, piping bags and tips. It took me about 2 1/2 hours to create the cake. The base was a heart, created by cutting a round cake in half and sticking it on the ends of the square cake. The cakes were torted and lemon curd was smeared between the layers. I frosted this heart base with white buttercream and adorned it with white edible flecks. Onto of this went 2 eight inch round cakes, also torted and filled with lemon curd. Then the 6 inch round and the pyrex bowl cake. All of this was frosted with yellow gold buttercream and coated in gold flecks. I poured a little gold sanding sugar over it, and pressed gold sugar roses into the yellow mound. The mound would form the skirt. The Barbie/Sarah would be inserted into the rounded pyrex bowl cake at the top of the cake. The cake went into the fridge to chill until the cake cutting at 11PM. I then got dressed with Zoe J. and Sarah and soon guests were arriving. Zoe wore a gold animal print top with a scrap of lame for a skirt. Sarah wore a wedding dress with pouf-sleeves that she hiked up in the front, and gathered in a traine at the back. The outfit was complete with white bloomers peeking out the bottom. Everyone looked great, and we sprayed ourselves down with gold glitter body spray (a totally random find on clearance at Albertsons). It was a tight squeeze, but everything was finished just as guests started to arrive.
It ended up being a great party. It was packed with people, and everyone was having a good time. Lots of people wore gold, and there was plenty of booze. At 11PM John and Eleni made calls to coordinate the arrival of Dan and the cake cutting ceremony. I blindfolded Sarah, and we herded everyone into the living room. I carried in a cake and got on a chair to lead the chorus of Happy Birthday. Then John and Eleni brought in Dan, who instead of proposing said something funny. Sarah was confused and shocked, most of the guests didn't know who he was, and those that did, were surprised. Things didn't go over as well as I had hoped, but John and Eleni seemed happy with it, so I sat down, and drank my pinneapple soda/vodka cocktail. Alexis arrived and I started another round of happy birthday, and held up the cake to restore order. Alexis cut the cake and passed it out. Megan Rosati paid me a compliment, calling me a "domestic diva" and joked that I should be married. I realized, and replied, that I while I like my domestic hobbies, I think I'd grow to resent them if they became chores, or if I had to do them on regular basis for someone else without the sprakle and glory of "entertaining." Megan's comment made me really realize that right now I'm taking care of me. Hell, I don't even have a cat yet. I was exhausted, but now that the Dan surprise had landed, I had the rest of the night to get drunk, dance, and mingle, which is what I did. The cake was delicious by the way. Very moist.
The party thinned out around 12:30, but it had a second wave around 1:30 when people started dancing. Zoe P. and her friend Gabi took over the Ipod and we danced to some high school-era pop music. "No Scrubs" was in there. I had completely forgotten about No Scrubs! There were NU people, and random strangers, and Sarah's old co-workers at Cartoon Network, and friends of friends of friends. There was some debachery. Greg P. gave Sarah this edible candy g-string, which she wore over her bloomers. Most party guests took a bite. I'm sure the pictures of me will surface someday. 4 guys wandered in from the down the street, and I knew there was something off about them when they politely introduced themselves to everyone inside. Later in the night they'd antagonize the cops that came by to quiet us down. One of the guys kept insisting that Zoe P. have a sip of his "purple drink" which was grape soda and, oh, I don't know, roofies? Another was the spitting image of Justin Long, you know, the Mac guy. Then there was Eleni's work-friend who was super cute and flirting with a bunch of dudes. Robert ended up getting her email address. By the end of the night she was pretty drunk (weren't we all) and humped me on the couch, where I lay recouperating from over zealous dance moves. I told Rob, that if he gets to sleep with her so do I. The dancing continued until 3:45 when the cops showed up. It felt like college all over again. Those of us that remained piled on the couch together, at Dan Mahoney's request, and had a group hug/sit. By that time it had thinned out, and I ate the remains of Sarah's goat-cheese cheeseball.
Robert and I went home around 4AM and slept most of Saturday, getting up around 2PM to go eat brunch at Fred 62's a local, slightly overpriced 24-hour diner. There's always some fashionable co-habitating couple--a muscly dad in a vintage t carrying a well-dressed baby with one muscley arm. Or some tragic couple in skinny jeans picking at waffles and fruit while their tiny dog sleeps at their feet. Or me hungover with crusty hairspray hair.
All in all it was a great success, save for the complicated emotions that would be felt at Sarah & John's apartment with an ex-boyfriend in town for the weekend. That's why I give the gift of cake: it looks good, it tastes good, and everybody loves it.
"By the age of 25 most Midwestern people have already married, divorced, had children, or held a union job. Sarah has had none of these things. As our plucky Indiana native stands on the precipice of her "late" twenties, we gather to celebrate her singledom and desperation with a bidding war for her hand in marriage (seriously...j/k...no, really). Turning 25 on January 25th, this golden birthday will be sure to shower Sarah with the rites of domestic passage that have long evaded her crazy. Let us raise a golden glass to the golden girl who puts Bea Arthur to shame.
Wearing gold clothing, bringing bars of gold, and/or contributing BOOZE are all highly encouraged. I will use my Midas touch to craft a golden cake that will blind Goldfinger himself with its brilliance."
I love polling guests in Evite invitations and my questions included, "Would you marry Sarah?", "Just how badly does Sarah want to be married?", "How old will Sarah be when she gets married?" It was funny. A few weeks before the party Rob, Sarah, and I went down to the fabric district to get fabric for my party dress. I wanted to sew something outrageous out of gold lame. I have for years. I really want a gold lame turban, a la "Sunset Boulevard." I don't know if Norma Desmond's turban was lame or gold, but she had a turban and I want one. I ended up buying some lame and some fun leopard print, with no idea what I would sew.
I also had the task of coming up with a cake idea that would outshine (literally and figuratively) the infamous CoCake of 2007. I found inspiration at a great website: Coolest Birthday Cakes.com. They had a whole section of Barbie Cakes--maybe you've seen them--it's a cake with a Barbie doll torso coming out of the top--the cake part is Barbie's skirt. I decided to make a Barbie/Sarah cake and put it ontop of a heart shaped "wedding" type cake. For weeks, I was giddy in anticipation of what kind of cake I'd make, the mechanics of assembling, finding gold edible sprinkles, and all the right decorating tools. I ordered a bunch of cake stuff online since I couldn't find a store that carried edible gold flecks, and I found a doll for the cake that had the perfect Sarah bangs.
Meanwhile Eleni and John decided it would be funny to fly in Sarah's ex-boyfriend, Dan Mahoney, and have him propose to Sarah in the middle of the cake cutting ceremony at 11pm. Flights were scheduled, plans were made. Stress levels were high. Everyone was nervous...what the hell was going to happen on Friday night?
Wednesday night I made two trays of lemon and peach Jell-O shots, and sewed a top for the Barbie/Sarah doll out of gold lame. I combed her hair, trimmed her bangs, and sewed a little bouquet of flowers onto her hand. For Jell-O shots I like to use the large box of Jell-O and about 1 1/4 cups vodka instead of cold water. Give it a try, really easy and tasty.
Thursday night I baked the cake at Sarah's house. The recipe was a lemon cake by Martha Stewart. Martha is diabolical. Her recipes are great, but it's almost like she wants you to fuck it up. She has these cryptic instructions, for example, on the lemon cake there was this gem: "Drizzle in eggs, a little at a time, beating after each addition until batter is no longer slick." No longer slick? What the hell does that mean? I made a triple batch of cake: 3 eight inch rounds, 1 square pan, 1 six inch round, 1 pyrex dish. I made a triple batch of lemon curd to go between each layer, and a hell of a lot of buttercream frosting. Some of it I left white, and some of it I dyed a vibrant yellow-gold. Between the buttercream frosting, lemon curd, and cake, the cake had 14 eggs in it, 9 cups of flour, 7 cups of sugar, 4 cups of buttermilk, and tons of lemon zest. There was also a little of my blood in there--from zesting the lemons. I found some lemon extract which really helped give it a great lemon flavor without losing a finger to the zester. Thursday night I baked all the cakes, made the lemon curd, and the buttercream. The cakes were cooled and wrapped in plastic so that they'd be firm enough to shave and shape the next day. I was exhausted, but the mass production of it all was exhilerating. The KitchenAid mixer was filled to the brim. John and Eleni arranged the gold wedding balloons I'd bought in a big heart on the wall.
Speaking of KitchenAid mixers, I really really really want one. It's one of those things that I don't necessarily need, but would be really great to have, and I really really really want one. I've promised myself I won't buy one until I've "earned it." By that I mean, I won't buy it until I can justify dropping $200-$500 on one without feeling guilty about it. They come in such lovely colors! Purple. I want a purple one. Industrial strength.
Anyhoo, I'd worked on sewing my dress a few weeks prior. The lame turned out not to turn out, and as such I turned to the leopard print. For weeks I'd been wanting something sexy in leopard print, but nothing had caught my eye at the stores. I decided to use the fabric I'd bought for the party and ended up sewing a dress that while simple in construction, turned out really hot. I paired a gold lame shrug, and black faux-suede pumps with the dress. When I tried it all on together, I couldn't help but bellow "Goldfinger" in a Bassey boom.
Friday I made more Jell-O shots and then took a nap. I headed over to Sarah's around 6:15 to assemble the cake. I had borrowed Alexis's cake decorating equiptment; she had a decorating stand, piping bags and tips. It took me about 2 1/2 hours to create the cake. The base was a heart, created by cutting a round cake in half and sticking it on the ends of the square cake. The cakes were torted and lemon curd was smeared between the layers. I frosted this heart base with white buttercream and adorned it with white edible flecks. Onto of this went 2 eight inch round cakes, also torted and filled with lemon curd. Then the 6 inch round and the pyrex bowl cake. All of this was frosted with yellow gold buttercream and coated in gold flecks. I poured a little gold sanding sugar over it, and pressed gold sugar roses into the yellow mound. The mound would form the skirt. The Barbie/Sarah would be inserted into the rounded pyrex bowl cake at the top of the cake. The cake went into the fridge to chill until the cake cutting at 11PM. I then got dressed with Zoe J. and Sarah and soon guests were arriving. Zoe wore a gold animal print top with a scrap of lame for a skirt. Sarah wore a wedding dress with pouf-sleeves that she hiked up in the front, and gathered in a traine at the back. The outfit was complete with white bloomers peeking out the bottom. Everyone looked great, and we sprayed ourselves down with gold glitter body spray (a totally random find on clearance at Albertsons). It was a tight squeeze, but everything was finished just as guests started to arrive.
It ended up being a great party. It was packed with people, and everyone was having a good time. Lots of people wore gold, and there was plenty of booze. At 11PM John and Eleni made calls to coordinate the arrival of Dan and the cake cutting ceremony. I blindfolded Sarah, and we herded everyone into the living room. I carried in a cake and got on a chair to lead the chorus of Happy Birthday. Then John and Eleni brought in Dan, who instead of proposing said something funny. Sarah was confused and shocked, most of the guests didn't know who he was, and those that did, were surprised. Things didn't go over as well as I had hoped, but John and Eleni seemed happy with it, so I sat down, and drank my pinneapple soda/vodka cocktail. Alexis arrived and I started another round of happy birthday, and held up the cake to restore order. Alexis cut the cake and passed it out. Megan Rosati paid me a compliment, calling me a "domestic diva" and joked that I should be married. I realized, and replied, that I while I like my domestic hobbies, I think I'd grow to resent them if they became chores, or if I had to do them on regular basis for someone else without the sprakle and glory of "entertaining." Megan's comment made me really realize that right now I'm taking care of me. Hell, I don't even have a cat yet. I was exhausted, but now that the Dan surprise had landed, I had the rest of the night to get drunk, dance, and mingle, which is what I did. The cake was delicious by the way. Very moist.
The party thinned out around 12:30, but it had a second wave around 1:30 when people started dancing. Zoe P. and her friend Gabi took over the Ipod and we danced to some high school-era pop music. "No Scrubs" was in there. I had completely forgotten about No Scrubs! There were NU people, and random strangers, and Sarah's old co-workers at Cartoon Network, and friends of friends of friends. There was some debachery. Greg P. gave Sarah this edible candy g-string, which she wore over her bloomers. Most party guests took a bite. I'm sure the pictures of me will surface someday. 4 guys wandered in from the down the street, and I knew there was something off about them when they politely introduced themselves to everyone inside. Later in the night they'd antagonize the cops that came by to quiet us down. One of the guys kept insisting that Zoe P. have a sip of his "purple drink" which was grape soda and, oh, I don't know, roofies? Another was the spitting image of Justin Long, you know, the Mac guy. Then there was Eleni's work-friend who was super cute and flirting with a bunch of dudes. Robert ended up getting her email address. By the end of the night she was pretty drunk (weren't we all) and humped me on the couch, where I lay recouperating from over zealous dance moves. I told Rob, that if he gets to sleep with her so do I. The dancing continued until 3:45 when the cops showed up. It felt like college all over again. Those of us that remained piled on the couch together, at Dan Mahoney's request, and had a group hug/sit. By that time it had thinned out, and I ate the remains of Sarah's goat-cheese cheeseball.
Robert and I went home around 4AM and slept most of Saturday, getting up around 2PM to go eat brunch at Fred 62's a local, slightly overpriced 24-hour diner. There's always some fashionable co-habitating couple--a muscly dad in a vintage t carrying a well-dressed baby with one muscley arm. Or some tragic couple in skinny jeans picking at waffles and fruit while their tiny dog sleeps at their feet. Or me hungover with crusty hairspray hair.
All in all it was a great success, save for the complicated emotions that would be felt at Sarah & John's apartment with an ex-boyfriend in town for the weekend. That's why I give the gift of cake: it looks good, it tastes good, and everybody loves it.
posted by Eileen at 4:46 PM
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